I could just sit here and write down how wonderful you are. Kind. Gentle. Strong and patient.
You’ve heard me say it all. And forgive me, but you’re going to hear me say it all over again regardless. This won’t be the last time either.
I told you that you were my soul mate. Austin everyone thinks I did it to mess with you but we both know that I kind of meant it. You mentioned Holst and how much you love the Planets. I love that too. You have the soul of musician, and more than that, a performer. You know and you understand the untouchable emotion that comes from actually creating the music and letting flow out through your body.
You mentioned that when you hang out with friends you normally just go on walks. Bless your soul, you understand the drive in the heart and the great adventures that lay just outside the door waiting to be claimed by ripped soles.
You told me that you just loved sports. And I knew by the way you tensed when you spoke about it that you had an unquenchable fire down inside. Uncontainable. You understood the passion that drives an athlete to endure the blood, the exhaustion and the aching undulations that pulse from an overworked body.
You communicated all that and more to me with your answers and I just knew you were like me. Another Sasquatch.
Immediately and suddenly the world felt a little less lonely. Something snapped in my mind and a new curiosity and devotion to you formed. There was no hesitation and there was no refrain.
Austin, I am so glad, that you are my brother. Closer than that. Not because I’m the one you run to when you have an issue, but because you feel the same way about life and the world. You process this swirling life of chaos the same way I do. Analagous souls. Parralel lives.
Austin Jeffery Davis. Thank you because you see straight to my heart and last night sweeping the store I told you of everything that shakes my will. I told you of how I am the great unwanted DUFF.
I lost all of that weight and I’m still alone. Now we both know I didn’t loose the weight to be loved. Screw that. But even for all of the pig headed shallow men our age my personality is still so strong that even if they were to be attracted to me I must repulse. Because if it’s not the looks it is actually just me.
I don’t want to forget the way you looked: you pursed your lips, took a deep breath and looked to the side for a second, hand up and resting on the wall.
"Sam I don’t want to make things weird but honestly, if there were another universe where I was single, I would want to be with you. You’re a great catch"
And Austin, thank you. There are few men I respect. I can count them on one hand. You my friend are the first I’ve respected who has ever said anything like that.
I needed to hear it, and I needed to hear it from someone I respect.
Again I don’t need to clarify that we’re just friends. I like how I never have to do it,
But you are handsome, witty, wise, hardworking and I hope that you will always be my friend.
I hate you :)